Keys of a Good Marriage
What are the keys of a good marriage? Many people looking to improve their marriage ask this question. Have you ever gone out with another couple and thought to yourself "Wow, it seems like they have a really good marriage!. What exactly are you seeing? That is the time to dissect what you seeing going on between them, and how they are acting toward each other that makes you envy their relationship. My guess is you are probably seeing some of the qualities that I will mention below.
The Ability to Communicate EffectivelyThe ability to communicate effectively is one of the most important keys to a good marriage. Communicating "effectively" does not mean you never argue or disagree. It means that you are able to listen and hear what your partner is saying, even if you disagree with it. A good exercise for you to try is the next time you sit down to talk to your spouse, try and repeat in your own words what they are saying. For example:
If your spouse says "You never take out the trash!" Your response might be "I hear that you are angry I don't take out the garbage more often"
You would be surprised at how often a major blow-out can be diffused just by repeating back what the other says. Repeating what your mate is saying shows that you are listening and care about what is important to them.
The Capacity to be Trustworthy
The capacity to be trustworthy is another important element of a good marriage. This isn't just about not commiting adultery. We have all heard how significant trust is to a marriage and how marriages can fall apart without it. But the bases comes from each person being trustworthy. Do you say what you mean and mean what you say? Do you do what you say you are going to do? Or do you hide things from your spouse?
The first step to build trust is to be trustworthy.
Truly Enjoy Each Others Company
Having hobbies or activities you enjoy together is an essential key to a good marriage. Would you rather spend time with your spouse or do find any excuse to get away from them? Disconnecting from your spouse means you are separating yourself from your marriage and this is not a good sign of a healthy marriage. You should truly enjoy each others company and look forward to spending time with them.
Truly Respect Each OtherDo you treat your spouse with respect and dignity? This is key to a good marriage. Do they treat you the same way? Obvioulsy this is an important aspect of a prosperous marriage. Partners who repect each other DO NOT berate, belittle, or constantly criticize their mates.The best way to asses if your spouse respects you is what I call the Walk Away Test. When you walk away from your spouse after an interaction with your partner ask yourself how you feel. Do you feel good about yourself or bad? The answer to this question may determine whether or not your spouse repects you.
|
